“I screwed up the interview so badly. Those people must think I am an idiot”.
Words from my client.
She had an interview that did not go as she hoped and now she went right down the negative thought rabbit hole. She was having a hard time hearing me when I was suggesting other possible ways to look at what happened on the interview and how she might be able to rectify it at best and learn from it at the very least.
She was having none of it.
I knew that we needed to work with her thoughts, the real magic behind coaching to better outcomes, but I also knew that we could not start there.
The fact is that it was never going to help my client for me to “talk” her down off the ledge.
Because her stress was high after the “failed” interview, she was in a state of narrowed focus. Her brain thought she was unsafe. She had limited access to her rational mind and critical thinking skills. She literally was not hearing me.
When you have a bad interview or meeting with your boss or think you said something stupid, in most cases, our first response is to chastise ourselves. We go down that rabbit hole of self-criticism.
And it feels lousy.
Yet it also feels like we can’t stop the chain of thoughts. They are not in our control.
Under these circumstances, you cannot try to change your thoughts…yet.
You have to go to your body to disrupt the monkey mind.
Step 1: With your left hand, tap the ‘karate chop” portion of your right hand along the edge just below your pinky finger. Tap at a fast pace.
Step 2: Switch and quickly tap your “karate chop” point on your left hand.
Step 3: Now begin to slow down the tapping. You can switch between hands as often as you would like or just stick with one hand. Keep tapping.
Step 4: As you slow down the tapping move your focus to your breath and begin to deepen your breaths. Breathe in deeply through your nose completely filling up your lungs then take in 1 more breath. Exhale fully. Repeat several times until you notice you are feeling calmer.
Step 5: Now move into thought work. If you do not yet have a thought work practice. join me on an upcoming webinar called GET YOUR CAREER DRIVE BACK and I will walk you through it.